Yesterday I received an acceptance letter from the University.
Today I received a notification that my financial aid is being processed.
This very moment I am FREAKING OUT!!!!
I'm excited, yes. I'm scared to death, yes. I believe this is what my future is supposed to look like, even though one week ago college didn't register on my radar. Funny that. My life is progressing forward quite nicely. My kids are giggling at the "your mom goes to college" joke from Napoleon Dynamite. They've all agreed to pitch in and help me with my homework...even my 8 year old. Sadly, he is probably more advanced in his education than I am. It's been SO long!! And when I was in school, I was horrible. I barely graduated high school and then pretended to go to school for a couple of semesters way back when. I would be lying if I thought this was going to be anything other than entirely frightening and difficult.
But I have my orders.
* I HAVE to first become and then remain POSITIVE (that will be tricky).
* I CANNOT put myself down constantly.
* I HAVE to believe that I'm capable of doing well in school.
* I HAVE to recognize the good that will come from this major step in my journey forward.
I'm not kidding... I'm being FORCED into these things. : ) What a challenge! And I thought college was going to be hard!!
But as I sit here today, writing about my eventual college education becoming a reality, I find myself more confident in myself. Why can't I do well? Why can't I take classes and get good grades? Why can't I make a name for myself? The truth is that I CAN. And I WILL.